Auntie, The Other Room & Serving it Right
Taste differs when it comes to what interests a man in a lady because every man has his own definition of wife material. It could be your ability to stay calm during tough situations, your cooking skills, how respectful you are, how prayerful you are, how caring and loving you are, how selfless you are or how you're good on bed! Yes I said it. It could be how you're good on bed and I'm not talking about sleeping, instead, I'm talking about what mum and dad exercise with at night when they think everyone of us are asleep!
Sex is quite underrated in most matrimonial homes. Most women think being a wife is only about cooking delicious meal, setting the tables, doing the dishes, cleaning the house and so on but let me take my time to tell you that you are wrong! Your marriage will not last or mildly put, you could have a troubled home if sexual expectations are not met with you. Alas, most men love to do shuku shuku bam bam. Aunty give it to him steady steady! Because if you don't, you're slowly breaking your home. There are young ladies out there that are praying that you keep telling him 'honey, I'm tired', 'baby, come on, we still did it on Tuesday', 'sweetheart, is it food? Se you want to kill me ni?'. I pity you. Very soon you will realize a strange woman aroung, if care is not taken. That sounds extreme, right?
How about, that you’re married to a good, godly man, whom you so much know that, no matter what, he would not play sex outside home. Yes, I have seen such persons too, but do you know what he does with himself when he is alone? Auntie listen, when a man is loaded, he must discharge! You know what it is like when a mother is breastfeeding a baby. When her breast is full of milk, she must discharge! It is weight. It needs to be off loaded. So that your man, yes he is not looking outside. He looks inside but when she would not be there for him, it could be so much agony. Let me put it in this perspective, you took a vow to feed on one meal (say rice) for the rest of your life. Now, your rice could come in different varieties. Today, fried rice, tomorrow jollof rice. At another day, ofada rice, and yet another coconut rice. Different day, different spicing. But sadly, see a man whose rice comes as white rice everyday with the same stew. More sadly, this rice is not sometimes served! He is made to go to bed without meal…
He has taken an oath and he will not break it. Not just for you but he took it before his Maker. More importantly, blessed is the man that sworeth to his own hurt, and changeth not—that is who he is, he cannot break the vow. But this same godly man needs to discharge… So, he balances up. Doing it with himself, for himself. Since you are not there for him!
It is important to take care of the home—the kids, the meals and help with resources when you could. But more, meet that his singular paramount need, that ultimately makes him a man. This seldom discussed issue has broken most homes and will break more. It is a weapon for evil or for good. It is a bond, an intimacy that cannot be told to another. And apart from financial capability of the man, it has and will wreck many homes.
So auntie, you need to be awake to this duty. This simply, yet destructive task that mars most homes. You need to meet this need. Be there every time, all time, and always. It is a weapon that could slain any, everyman (ask the mighty Samson).
Be the choice rice. Be the fried or jollof, be the coconut rice with occasional ofada with efo riro and peppered stew. Garnish it will fresh salad, diced fried plantain and assorted meat. Serve it hot and fresh!
Be all your man desires…